When God's Kindness Feels Painful
We tend to think that good things feel good and bad things feel bad. If something feels painful, it must be bad; if it feels good, it must be good. Well, the reality is, God's kindness, protection, and love often feel painful as a necessity and a consequence of our fallenness. His kindness can take the form of reality checks so we don't go on a destructive or fruitless path. It can take the form of the loss of something we thought was good but was a snake in disguise. It can show up as the sudden stripping away of an idol we would never have let go of otherwise. It can be God not answering a prayer the way we wanted. Perhaps one of the clearest examples in the Scriptures is Paul’s Thorn in the Flesh:
“So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited.” (2 Corinthians 12:7, ESV)
The thorn was a painful harassment from Satan; but it was God’s love that allowed it in order to protect Paul from being ruined by conceit. As far as bad things, even obvious evil things like vengeance, sexual immorality, gossiping, and various indulgences feel good, let alone the more subtle ones. We cannot rely on our emotions to determine what is good or evil.
Death For Love
‘Lord, help me’ is probably my most frequent prayer, especially when words fail me. When you ask God for help, are you expecting that his help might be a painful walk through a dark valley? Probably not. I don't. See, the time in history when we see the ultimate display of God's love for us was the brutal killing of His Only Son on the cross.
"but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8, ESV)
Do you think the apostles who had come to believe that Jesus was God's salvation for Israel felt his crucifixion was a display of God's love for them, the perfect unraveling of his plan? Certainly not. At the time, it was painful, confusing, and heartbreaking. Yes, sometimes bad things do feel bad and good things feel good. The way to distinguish is to learn from God through the scriptures. We must learn the Character of God and his ways. What does he call good? What does he call evil? This is our compass, not our feelings, intuition, or perception.
Don’t Lose Sight of His Goodness
Recently I learned something that shook me to the core and overwhelmed(s) me with sadness. I felt wronged by God, let down, and not protected; but then the Holy Spirit helped me to see how incredibly wrong I was. This whole thing was (is) actually God being kind to me. I need to constantly remind myself of that.
My encouragement to you and me is to not let painful circumstances twist our view of God. God is near the brokenhearted (Psalms 34:18, ESV). Though the wind violently blows, God is with you and working on your behalf.
The famous saying remains true. "God is good all the time. All the time God is good". Even better, we have a hope, the Hope of Glory that transcends this reality. One day, when Christ returns and God renews all things, judges evil and sin for good, there will be no more pain, no more sorrow or tears. God's Kindness will only feel like what it is … Good.
